the Devil did push his head up through the ages of rock and bring down upon the earth a rain of lava and hellfire, and we did ask him, we did turn to him and say: Yo, the Devil, what the fuck are you doing here? We weren't expecting you here. buy instagram followers instantly Thought we had a thousand more years. And the Devil did crush the mountains down to dust and turn the seas to stone and the earth was rendered instantly fallow and we were like: Dude, why did you do that? Du–ude! You just killed all of the corn, man! We were going to eat that shit! What the fuck, the Devil? And the Devil did turn to us and with a voice as deep as a thousand trucks revving in an old cave, with a voice impure and dirty, and did scream into the mayhem-filled sky just a single word.What I am saying here is that teenagers are using social media to summon up a Mexican demon called "Charlie" and this seems like both the natural conclusion to things here in the corporeal realm ("How did the world end?" "Teens summoned a demon for Vine likes and then fire embraced the world
I think it's safe to say here that #teens are not truly summoning the spirit of some Mexican devil-lite, but are in fact summoning the whole internet to an obscure hashtag to look at some pens and pencils arranged in a cross, buy followers instagram slowly revolving while someone screams. Because that's it, isn't it? Teenagers have finally become self-aware, and are trolling the entire world with some hokey Ouija board-esque shit.If you are a teenager, please don't read the following paragraphs, and just skip straight ahead to the conclusion. If you are a real person: Have you ever felt at once closer to death and further from your youth than seeing this Because this is what #teens are: creatures without responsibility but locked into strict curfews; humans with a wriggling sense of urgent energy about them, keen to get out and crush the world and forge it anew in their own image, but still having to do exams about algebra and shit. They are colts revving in the stables of life, and they all have a really good 4G connection.
This is the thing. When I was a #teen the greatest thrill I could hope to experience was finding some glossy-print pornography under a bush or getting drunk on clear and cold and illicitly-got cider before doing a basic sex act on a park bench. app to buy instagram followers When I was a #teen, going to France and buying a penknife automatically made you the coolest boy at school. Now #teens have had smartphones basically as long as they have been alive. Now #teens are all Vine celebrities or YouTube vloggers. Imagine how insane you would have gone if you had this kind of untapped internet access when you were 15. Imagine if every stupid tweet you did was dissected and presented as the end of days by tabloid papers across the world. What I am saying is this: of course #teens are summoning The Devil up from the very bowels of hell, to scorch our earth of both #teens and the adults who make it their business to ruin the lives of #teens. It's the natural conclusion to a world obsessed with instant access to taste-making semi-adults, bored and drunk on their own small power, Snapchatting one final picture of their junk to one another as the molten asteroids pelt us down to nothing.